The Anatomy of a Hater

In my online experience, I've accumulated some haters. There are people whose existence I was unaware of who, at some point, make a comment about me, and when I look at the person's history, I see that it's the 10th time they've talked about me.

This isn't an uncommon experience, just as the experience of having what you say distorted isn't uncommon, or of having posts made saying that you don't know anything and don't deserve the position you hold.

Dealing with hate is unfortunately unsatisfactory. You can expose the dumbest haters on your social media, and it's sometimes even funny, but ultimately, it's a waste of time.

The anatomy of a hater is that of someone deeply frustrated, a crab in a bucket who tries to prevent the other crabs from leaving the bucket. The greater the anonymity, the greater the freedom the person feels to vent their own frustrations on others. Almost always, haters don't have good writing skills, don't know how to communicate well, and think they are much more intelligent than they really are. This explains their frustration; they are mostly dumb people who think they should have gotten further in life because they believe they are very intelligent, but they were prevented by their own stupidity.

The hater generally doesn't believe in growth, in improvement, in development. If in 2017 you made a mistake on the internet, they will try to bring it up. This belief that it is impossible to develop is the belief that limits their own growth. A belief in a fixed and predetermined hierarchy, where intelligent people, like them, are on a higher level than less intelligent people like the one who is the target of hate.

By believing in fixed capacities, in extremely limited growth potential, the hater doesn't see themselves as capable of rising. They can't become, for example, a tennis player capable of getting scholarships at major universities, therefore, neither can you. They didn't reach the position they believe they deserve, therefore, neither will you. They never did a master's degree abroad, never had an important job, never did anything relevant.

The hater, ultimately, is a validation that you are distancing yourself from them, that you are getting out of the bucket. They can't understand how you do it, so you must be stealing, cheating, doing something unethical. They can't understand your arguments, can't understand how you got where you got, so it must all be a lie or wrong. The hater's dream is that you are a "fraud" who will be unmasked at any moment, and that your life "returns," falls, to a level below the hater's level, which is where you belong according to them.

Unlike haters, I believe in change, I believe in growth. I have seen and lived this in my life. So I believe that a hater, who wastes their time trying to pull people down on the internet, can improve as a person. Can be helped.

However, I am not Jesus, and I have more to do with my life than waste time trying to help people who hate me deal with their own insecurities. I can't even help all my friends and family. After friends and family, there is still a list of thousands of people who actually like me and who ask me for help, for direction, for attention, and whom I also don't have the time or availability to help.

Therefore, I only have one alternative for haters. I don't like to read hate, so I mute and block. The final destination of a hater is to isolate themselves from all those who yearn and seek improvement, and to unite with all those whose favorite pastime is trying to bring others down. If the behavior continues, the person is doomed to waste valuable time that they could use to improve themselves, or just to enjoy life with their small (and decreasing) number of friends.

The person is doomed to a life of eternal frustration, where they believe that venting frustration will help, but it only hinders because they don't even succeed in that. After all, the more people distance themselves from haters, the less they even bother to interact.

Again, I am not Jesus. This is a case that is treated with therapy, and it is far from my responsibility. I will do absolutely nothing to try to change this situation, just let the haters find the final conclusion of their actions. This destiny is perfectly adequate and exactly deserved.